circles of PR hell
I have recently been asked to come to a conference for creative industries and talk about cooperation with communication specialists on projects. I started from asking what were people’s bigger problems with this sort of cooperation. Then I was asked what do I consider biggest obstacles in getting a communication-based job done well. And I fashioned my answer on the circles of Dante’s Inferno.
The below doesn’t necessarily relate to my experience. I do very little direct communication work, I am usually hired at planning stages of any project and people who appreciate the importance of planning tend to be in the Purgatory, where most of us float, awaiting imminent redemption. But it is firmly based on observation, either mine of people’s I know.
1. the “PR is for promotion” client
It starts with p and r… right? With no understanding what PR really is, this type of client comes up with interesting alternative ideas. Best case scenario they pull the “I’ll have whatever they have over there” on you and demand a campaign identical to one they once saw work well for some one. Worst case scenario they will make you run around with their logo tattooed on your face.
2. the “customers? what customers?” client
Targeting is always tough. It’s also tough to tell a client, that doing a campaign/project “for every one” means they might well take the money and wash them down the kitchen sink. Not knowing, who the brand is trying to talk to, will likely result in:
- assumption that all customers are like the client. Hence they will like everything the client likes and respond well to everything the client responds too;
- caring primarily about keep industry’s big fish happy. Sod the clients.
- you wanting to drown in your morning coffee approximately on your third week in the job.
3. the “i want million likes” client
Inhabits both the private and 3rd sector (not so much the public sector – they don’t care either way). The million likes client responds only to numbers. They will have you set up a social media account and want it to have 500 000 subscribers within a week. Also, won’t understand that fans’ the level of engagement can often be of more importance.
4. the “internet is free advertising” client
Well, adverts in newspapers cost a lot and on the internet you can have them for free! Let’s spam every one with information about our brand. It has to be visible.
Make sure you collect all expressions of anger, that this will inevitably cause. This is your only chance.
5. the “fix my product” client
If the perception of a brand is somehow distorted good cooperation with a communications specialist will entail them looking at the way brand is perceived, coming back with insights and proposing ways of improving this state of affairs. However if the client persistently spoils their product with mismanagement and bad decisions they will likely expect their PR guy or gal to compensate for it. In which case they need a spin doctor, not a communication specialist.
6. the “what if I change my mind” client
If your central nervous system is made of steal and you value your free time, this will a perfect person to work for. They will never make any decision earlier than last minute and will likely change most critical arrangements 5 minutes before you go live with a project. Strategic planning and long-distance goal setting work is absolutely pointless. Also, you’ll lose all customers eventually, and go on much needed holidays.
7. the Louis XIV client
Along the line from a Louis XIV’s song “me me me me, that’s all I ever wanna talk about” this client is typical for creative industries. Any text that is on company’s website has to be written by them (with compulsory personal touch) and 95% of visual output has to feature their face. Or at least their leg.
They are the brand and the brand is them. Thus they will more likely spend 60% of the budget on business class flights and 5 star hotels for themselves, than let you order a batch of business cards.
8. the “put a pink square over there” client
The pink square approach refers to visual communications as much as any other communications related activity. Doesn’t understand that choices have to follow a logically constructed strategy and will step in any time they have spare time to give their precious directions. Not that they have any knowledge of typefaces and their influence on message. They do know however, that they like verdana 8 and shall therefore put an end to all the hours of brainstorming you did with your graphic designer.
9. the “I only because I don’t have the time” client
Closely related to the pink square client and my personal favorite. Hires a PR specialist, only because they are too busy to do the PR for their project themselves. But were they not busy with actually running the joint, they would know how to do PR, sales, graphic design, make up, break up and producing soap. In fact they know it better than any person they might hire.
As far as I’m concerned this type is actually impossible to work with. Anything you do – they would do better. Which means they will modify your every idea, compromise your every strategy and later be unhappy with results. And blame you. Democratically, they probably didn’t like the work of any of your predecessors (some of whom might have actually simply been mediocre at what they do) and therefore not trust you from day one.
10. Satan
- Put “like this status if you like our brand” at the end of each update, please.
When I grow up I want to be Mike Mills
When I was even younger than I am now, I wanted to be a writer. Well, wanted. I was pretty convinced this was the only thing I could do for a living, without causing any trouble to myself or the humanity in general.
I tried and still try to deviate at times. The romance with documentary film started few years back and has been the longest and most serious affair thus far. It actually includes a lot of writing, at least in my case, proving perhaps that it all comes down to that one conviction I’ve had since the age of about 6.
But today, having watched a little flick called Beginners, especially the scene in which Ewan McGregor pats a butt on an Andrzej Krajewski poster hanging in his film-flat, and finding out a bit more about the director (again, I’m going to be writing about this film), I think I want to be Mike Mills when I grow up.
First of all the not too insolent mix between own experience portrait, mix of reality recreation and recreation of certain outlook. Second of all the thoughts of main character projected onto a dog – “While I understand up to 150 words, I don’t talk”. Thirdly – the graphic work, which is Mills’ own.
That thought that one can be a brilliant graphic designer, make amazing music videos and arrive at an amazing second feature, starring McGregor and Plummer – is very comforting to a 26 year old, who recently thought that maybe it was a big mistake to give up on natural sciences so early on. Maybe I would have been happy as a neuro-psychology researcher…
I’m far from being obsessed with starting early and obsess about a career from the cradle. But it’s tough to be good at things and it takes time. I have wanted – at one stage or the other – to write, to write songs, to be a journalist, to be a graphic designer,a developer, a photographer, an interactive media specialist, to direct films, to produce films… I imagine I’ll be a beginner for ever.
Beginner Mike Mills.
PS. you can actually learn a good few things about promoting an indie feature from the way Focus Features handles Beginners. Please meet – Cosmo the dog.