The fan girl that never was

I can’t recall ever being a fan girl for anything. Yes, Fabian would probably offer here that I’m a well known apple hopeless but really i’m a sad excuse for a fan (or fun for that matter). I didn’t stand in line to get an iPhone (notably little of the British public did), but more to the point I wouldn’t defeat them with the last drop of my blood (as you can read here I get about as pissy and overly opinionated about them as about anything else).

Parallely I never had posters of any one or anything up in my dangerous hormonal teenage den walls. Possibly the first celebrity I ever downloaded photos of (and that not naked) was Angelina Jolie and really that was a purely aesthetical appreciation based affair. I never bought any celebratory merchandise since lion king’s sticker book aged 9 and then when I was given stickers I sticked them somewhere else any way. It’s only fair that past by teenage years I’m introduced into the agonies and pains of being a true fan.

I spent 5 quid on yet another yellow submarine key ring. Exactly the same as the first one, which broke after under a year.

While in the queue to the check out in the Beatless store I managed to resist 50 pounds worth of traveling leather bag (bit too fan-boyish) but gave in to ten quid abbey road umbrella (’I live in London I’m gonna need one’).

I want a ‘Fear and loathing in Las Vegas’ poster. As well as a ‘Vintage doctor gonzo’ poster.

I read about ‘Spaced’ signing event at Kevin Smith’s store in LA. I went ape-shit. Although not nearly as much as I did upon learning that he did Q&A in London in 2005, when I was already living there (having watched the Q&A in question though I don’t regret it all that much, the questions were idiotic). At the end of the day I have Spaced collectors edition DVD box set to cheer me up in the former case.

I read about a poetry reading event he held at his house, with Stan Lee, Johny Rotten (’listen dad; you don’t know who you’re dealing with. I’m Rotten’) and Carrie Fisher (reciting ‘General Kenobi…’ speech) among others. 200$ to get in (and I presume some connections to even know it was happening) - I quickly counted it’s about a hundred quid and started figuring out where I’d magically come up with this sum from had I been in states, around LA at that time in 2006.

This post has been drafted entirely on my ipod touch. I rest my case.